There are hella fears in the world, just check out this list. My favorite one, only because its the first phobia I remember learning about (actually learned it from a scene in the movie, Home Alone), is Arachnophobia-fear of spiders. Random, I know. Below are two fears that I have had throughout my life. I’m sure if I spent more time dissecting and analyzing them, I would be able to find their connection and, more importantly, their origin, which undoubtedly stems from my upbringing. With such knowledge, I would then be able to rid myself completely of them. *shrug* I don’t have the time right now; I rather live my life and figure that stuff out on the whim.
Thanatophobia-Fear of Death
- When I was younger, I was petrified of death; the inevitability and unpredictability of it frightened me. Mostly, the latter shook me. It did not help that the popular adage to help people strive for “carpe diem” greatness was “Tomorrow isn’t promised to no one.” Well…the phrase did not make me scream “YOLO,” while doing different and adventurous things. In fact, I became unnecessarily preoccupied with “YODO” (You Only Die Once), which made me overly cautious, especially around heavy, moving objects like buses and cars. Then one day, I realized that I am going to die regardless of how careful I am. Thus, I should live the life that I want to live and be happy while doing so. Now, my decree to live life does not mean that I engage in extremely risky sports or behavior; for example, wingsuit flying isn’t for me. Fear conquered.
Atychiphobia-Fear of Failure
- Seeming unsatisfied living my life with no fear, I developed a fear of failure around high school, although its slightly less attractive twin, procrastination, and I have had a relationship since around middle school (waiting-till-Sunday-night-to-
complete-begin-my-homework-from-Friday kind of procrastination). Unlike my irrational fear of death, I could seemingly rationalize my fear of failure because the stakes get higher each year. Thus, if I slipped and fell from this never ending higher point, the consequences (and pain from the fall) would be great. Like my “YODO” days, this fear constricted my daily life, unwilling to take risks and undermining (aka self-sabotaging) my dreams and goals. It led to the laziest portion of my life because I was simply unwilling to try, fearful that a misstep would be the end of my seemingly perfect world. As a result, I did not get want I wanted, but appeased myself with false, yet soothing “at least I didn’t fail” pats on the back. But I did fail because the lack of trying resulted in not even getting close to my want or desire. I wish I could italicize “fear conquered” like I did with the previous fear, but I still battle with this one occasionally, too often for my liking. But, I am proud that I am no longer crippled by it; I realized that no one is perfect and failure or mistakes are commonplace. In fact, I’ve learned the most about myself through failure. Lastly, I also recognized that there are many people willing to help me in my endeavors, if and only if I take that first step and try. Fear subsided.
Writing down my fears felt freeing (and also provided a burst of productivity).
Be free and share your fears in the comments section. Do you have any different/funny/odd/normal fears? Please share.